Author S. K. Nicholas

Ladybirds and flies somewhere between the gates of heaven and hell. Writing as a gift. Writing as a curse. Waste yourself on inverted chambers others would’ve left behind at the very first chance, and as she wraps a towel around her head, I pull her close and sink my fingers deep within. Blinking echoes of yesterday, she drinks a glass of wine but my hangover wont allow it. Just hold on she says, it wont last forever. But what if she’s wrong. What if I feel like this until my beating heart beats no longer. Oceans between us as she burns brighter than the sun. A forest in my mind with no way out, she just links her fingers with mine and takes me to a place that others can’t find. This shell of three decades, growing older as she dances like nothing else matters. Covered with milk and honey, her eyes swim with a distant memory. Blessings on my pale chest, she takes me away. A mess of sin. She sings on my favourite street. She sweeps me off my drunken feet. The glory of existing as the world burns out of control, and as I break down for the fifteenth time, she just smiles with her head in the clouds. The colours of a carnival on her lips, she traces her name on my arms as the scent of leaves takes me back to my childhood. There’s something more than what they want me to think. There’s some kind of beauty that goes against the horrors of what they preach. It’s in the swaying of hearts. It’s in the quickening pulse that follows from the slightest of touches. Puking in the toilet, tears fall from my eyes yet she never leaves my side. Anxiety dripping from my nostrils, life tastes so hard, yet she keeps me going despite my best efforts to leave it all behind. Just another ghost, yet the one that matters the most. Some people never feel this way. What a pitiful waste of a life. Some just stick inside the lines, fearful of what lies beyond. Be mad. Fall apart. Put yourself back together, and taste some romance. Hold her close, and do what it takes to fire you up. Despite the hell, those brief moments of beauty make the pain worth it. Singing a different tune. Doing things on your own terms. And as you lay sleeping, she pulls up the blanket and carries you through the night.