Swallowed

stairs

I collected a vision of her, of her walking towards a point overlooking the town. A place where the sun smashes down, and she goes there, planting her hips, ready to flower, and I follow her, because she’s a beginning. Everything that moves goes away from here, but that’s already happened. Upon waking, I light a cigarette and produce a vision of glistening fluid and a tightened throat. Looking out the window, I see nothing. All the colours seem to merge with only pyramids visible. Times are cryptic, and only I understand them. Only I know where her sphere will travel today. She sits around, she radiates, she has her own orbit. She collects debris. I’m her debris. Her vulva contracts and expands like the beat in my head. I hear it as I try sleeping at night. Whenever she turns and looks at me, the ocean between her thighs calls me home, and it’s the centre of everything. I imagine her vulva placed overhead, a free floating monolith. Contract. Expand. I’m reaching for her now. Colours merging again, she knows I have the devil inside of me. On the train I pass buildings, buildings built by dead people. All sewage. All regurgitated every day. The people are no different. Always plugged in, always useless. On the train there’s this girl. She’s wearing this dress, and beneath it I can see her legs. I imagine the two of us entwined, her face buried in bedsheets and screaming for more. She looks at me and says nothing, but in her eyes she’s saying everything. When we get off, we walk side by side. Sweat dripping down my face, she remains pure. Lighting another cigarette and blowing smoke up to the sky, each of her footsteps spreads along the floor and up the walls, and with each of mine sucking them in, I breathe in her intoxicating scent. The heat of the heavens smashing down, she enjoys watching me suffer. Unable to keep hold of my cigarette, I’m overcome by dizziness. Imploding under the prick-eyed sun, being eaten alive, she starts growing. Flowers reaching up, spreading this way and that. Water rushing from her eyes, rivers gushing everywhere, I manage to get hold of myself and run back towards the subway. It’s refuge in an instant, but I miss her so quickly. Worming my way back in a panic, all swallowed up and obliterated by nature, the days pass me by in a never ending blur.

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