Author S. K. Nicholas

x and i: a novel

a journal for damned lovers vol 1-3

Thirsty Dog

building-1210022_1920

 

Your husband seems like a good man. He’s got a sweet smile, and in those photographs of yours, he holds you as if he means it. Oh, but the things I would do to you knowing how it would make him feel. I’m not a writer, I’m just a man with trembling hands and a taste for the destruction of beauty, because when something’s beautiful, it needs to be soiled, and you my dear, are very, very beautiful. In a downtown bar, I’ll impress with my words and charm with my manners while all the time trying to figure out if you know what I want, and despite your good nature and that ring you wear on your finger, deep down you have a taste for infidelity just like me. Flesh is a sin, but so is everything, so let me order us another drink, and let us descend together to a place where the truth is dirty, and always shall be. You’re cute. It’s your smile that does it, and the way you pose with your children. They’re the centre of your world, and I like a woman who treats her children well. In those photos you showed me, the ones where you were on holiday together, that’s where my fantasies first took hold. With a smile on your face as you stood on the beach with your arms above your head holding up the sun, I wanted so desperately to have you between my legs and to look you in the eye in the moment of climax. Without protection, and with your lips on mine, I desired to have it all and to cross the point of no return. Destruction is creation, and with every day that passes me by, I’m making up for lost time in doing unto others what’s been done to me.

25 responses to “Thirsty Dog”

  1. it still boggles me of how do you get all the strength to be you? did you get hurt sometimes by people not loving you back?
    i might just rambling but if you understand what i meant 🙂

    1. I guess it’s about being as honest and open as possible. All of us have been victims at some point, so there’s nothing different about my background. But to not be afraid of exploring those inner thoughts and feelings is the key to making something interesting. That’s the goal, anyway 🙂 x

      1. Being brave facing ourselves…tough one 😊

      2. Of course we can 😉
        We are the strong ones

  2. Gonçalo Julião Avatar
    Gonçalo Julião

    hmm I’ve been reading and liking your posts but, call me prejudiced if you will, I can’t bring myself to acknowledge someone who likes to come in between something they can’t have and destroy it… in fiction everything goes, I’m aware of that, but even so it’s despicable. You’re really talented though 🙂

    1. Thank you for your comment, it’s much appreciated 🙂 Even though these words are my own, their sentiments aren’t one I personally share, so I feel your anger. Having been on the receiving end of such a position myself, I know what a cruel thing it is. But even so, the psychology behind why people do what they do is fascinating. Is it on a conscious or subconscious level? Do they feel remorse or nothing at all? Humans never cease to astound me in both their kindness and evil.

      1. Gonçalo Julião Avatar
        Gonçalo Julião

        I share the same wonder about behaviour, and have also been victim of wrong doing, but I do think there is a choice and sometimes the self comes first against morals… in some weird way those who do wrong might not feel that much guilty when doing and a few will remain unapollagetic because they’re aloud to pursuit thir wants and needs, while others will feel guilty having to deal with life changing consequences. We should just come up with a sort of agreement that includes sexual deviance as a healthy part of being human, instead of downright cheating.

  3. fantastic writing. I like your comments about writing from the gut. Surely, we can read without assuming the writer has lived everything they write. Of course life experience plays big and without it, most writers suck. My hats off to you…I want to write like Anne Sexton. 🙂

    1. Thank you, Holly! 🙂 I think as long as we draw upon those experiences, and mean what we say, then we can’t go wrong. I’ve heard of Anne Sexton, but never read any of her stuff. I know I should, really. Maybe now’s the time! Xo

      1. I think you would enjoy the gutsy writing of Anne! xo

      2. Who do you prefer out of Anne Sexton and Sylvia Plath? Xo

      3. Definitely Anne, I’m not a big Plath fan, though I think she is a fine poet and master of metaphor. xo I would not turn down her gift of expression, for sure. 🙂

      4. I’ve read The Bell Jar, but that’s about it. I’ll definitely check out Anne Sexton, though. She sounds quite hard hitting from the description of her on Wikipedia xo

      5. I found he Bell Jar rather maudlin and …I didn’t care for it too much. I think her best poem is Ariel. It’s a work of art. xo

      6. Have you seen the film about her starring Gwyneth Paltrow? Apparently it’s quite good. I had a copy of it once, but someone borrowed it and never gave it back xo

      7. I did see the picture. I thought it was good, it is dark which is to be expected as she suffered from depression. I won’t say more, no spoilers, but I am glad I watched the movie. xo

      8. Looks like I’ll be picking up another copy then 😉 xo

      9. Don’t blame me if you cry :). Seriously, I liked it because I am interested in poetry and writing, some one who is not may find it uninteresting. Give it another go. xo

  4. I really really loved this. 🙂

    1. Thank you, I’m so glad you do! 🙂

Leave a reply to sitateofani Cancel reply