Anywhere

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Moving up a spiral staircase that never seems to end, the urge to piss myself is almost too strong to resist. Taking two steps at a time, I leap to the top and push open the red door. The walls within are red as well, red like the walls of her womb. Shaking the image from my head, I piss in the sink while looking in the mirror that hangs before me. My eyes, they, too, are red. It looks like I’ve been crying, but I’m just drunk. At first, it was beer, and then came the shots, so many shots, all of them burning my insides while making things oh so much better. Downstairs, some girl was blowing smoke into my face while we were stood outside sheltering from the rain beneath a giant umbrella. At first, she annoyed the hell out of me, and yet I was intrigued by the thought of her breasts beneath that jumper of hers. Yeah, it was red, as if it could be any other colour. She was cute. Big eyes. White teeth, sharp. She was full of laughter. Touching my arm at every opportunity, I just wanted to lift up her top and revert to being a child by suckling her milky breasts until the night was over and it was time to go home. With visions of dribbling her milk from the corners of my mouth while being patted on the back by her delicate hands, my only desire was to break down and cry, for the older I get, the more of a struggle it is to keep it all together. Showing no outward signs of weakness, I took her by the arm on the pretence of buying more cigarettes from the convenience store across the road, but the minute we left the group we were with, I grabbed hold of her and made her mine. Biting her neck as my right hand slid up her shirt, I grabbed hold of one of her breasts. Mouth on mouth. Tongues and saliva. Speeding vehicles and raindrops and fingernails and the taste of her lips then the taste of her chewed ear as we stood there drenched with a prolonged sigh escaping her throat as I bit her lower lip drawing blood. As red as everything else, it swirled in my mouth as she fell into my arms with abandon. Holding her close, the ground beneath our feet gave way and then I’m back staring at myself in the mirror while pissing my money and dreams down the plughole. Such a beast, but really, who gives a fuck?

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