You’re the Moonlight in This Town

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You, me and the sky beneath our feet. You and I and the damp bed sheets that just get in the way of what we’ve been meaning to say for so long now. If it doesn’t involve madness and a sense of unbecoming, it’s not worth it. If it doesn’t leave us not knowing who we are, then there’s no point. We piss on opulence much the same as we piss on the memory of those who didn’t have it in them to stay true to their words. Anyone can spout shit about beauty and truth, but so many leave it behind when they realise the quest for such things will see them cast adrift and humiliated by all those who never had the guts to do things differently. When I first saw you, I knew you were the moonlight that would show me the way. When we first spoke, I could see that you were never going to leave me, and you haven’t, because here I am all these years later with you on my mind when there are so many others that had the chance to replace you, and they never came close. In the lonely hours when the rest are sleeping, I write my words and drink my beer and when the music gets under my skin, I can taste the beauty of the secrets we shared and of those that are waiting for us on the outskirts of this damned little town populated by so many damned little people. But if they want to be blind, then let them. Their samey demises are of no concern to us whatsoever, and nor are their minor triumphs that hold as much meaning as a fart in a paper bag. A triumph for us is to keep our heads held high even when we’re drowned. It’s to keep breathing even though the wind has been kicked out of us after so many relentless defeats. Yeah we’ve got cracked ribs and yeah our faces have been pushed in the dirt, but as we hold onto each other as the wind stirs up and the rain begins to fall, there’s nothing that comes close to what we have in each other’s arms. Cocooned from harm, we stay alive when the rest want us respectable and dead. And this just won’t do at all.

A Journal for Damned Lovers on Amazon.co.uk

A Journal for Damned Lovers on Amazon.com

20 replies »

  1. This is beautiful, sad, honest and raw and made me wish that I was with the someone who thought enough of me to write something like this.
    “When we first spoke, I could see that you were never going to leave me, and you haven’t, because here I am all these years later with you on my mind when there are so many others that had the chance to replace you, and they never came close.”

    You made me cry, Stephen.

    • I’m honoured to have received this comment, and so I thank you very much. I’m touched it brought a tear to your eye. Love is never easy, and it’s never simple. Most of the time we’re miles away from even breathing in its scent, but that’s what makes us the giddy fools we are for a taste of it x

  2. Every woman or man longs to be loved and immortalized in this way. “When we first spoke, I could see that you were never going to leave me, and you haven’t because here I am all these years later with you on my mind when there are so many others that had the chance to replace you, and they never came close.” I love the rawness and poignant beauty shared with us in this journal entry, Stephen.

  3. Reblogged this on and commented:
    I had the opportunity to do a reading last week and made sure that I gave credit where credit was due. I don’t know where SD would be without the inspiration provided by S.K. Nicholas.

  4. I loved this from start to finish. It captured the essence of the divide I felt between myself and everyone else I grew up with in a broken-down mill town in Central Massachusetts where the cows outnumbered the people. I burned for things no one else around me even seemed to have heard of, let alone longed for. Thank you.

    • Ooh, you grew up in Massachusetts? My hometown is called Dunstable, and I believe there’s Dunstable over there, too. Have you ever heard/been?
      I’m touched you enjoyed this piece.
      I like writing these words. They make me feel alive.

      • There is a Dunstable, Massachusetts. It is directly north of where I grew up (a little town named East Douglas) and very close to the New Hampshire border. I have been through it on my way to New Hampshire and Vermont. Have you ever traveled in the US? That part of New England is spectacularly beautiful in the fall when all the leaves are changing, a riot of red, orange and yellow. I have lived in the Philadelphia are for almost 30 years and still miss New England fiercely in the fall.

      • No, never been to the US. The spiders there are too big. And you’ve got Donald Trump as well.

        If I did visit I’d like to pay a trip to Maine. And other such places as opposed to the touristy hotspots like Florida and New York.

      • I wasn’t aware that we were known for giant spiders! Donald Trump, on the other hand. . . Maine is quite beautiful but the shore is quite rocky and the water quite cold. Cape Cod (Massachusetts) is my favorite place in the whole world. I would love to live by the sea, hear the waves crash and smell the salt air while I write. San Francisco, California is wonderful if you like cities.

      • Not as well known as Australia, but pretty much. Samantha was telling me about her experiences with Huntsman spiders, and the prospect of visiting the US suddenly became less appealing 😉

      • My impression is that they are only native to Florida and Texas. Though, if you were to listen to my kids, Shelob lives in their bathroom . They have already ruled out ever traveling to Australia

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