She cried softly at first, and then she cried hard. She wasn’t even sure why, but the more she told herself not to the more the tears came one after the other until there was no controlling them at all. As she rested her head against his bare chest, he kissed the back of her neck and held her. There were no words, just his fingers going round in circles over her throbbing temples as her body shuddered and shook. It soothed her. Not enough for her to stop crying, but enough to remind her that she wasn’t alone. And that’s what it was all about, wasn’t it? Not wanting to be alone. She was terrified of it, and now she had met someone, she was scared shitless he would leave. It was stupid. She felt stupid. Felt like she wanted to run but then what good would that do? She’d been running for so long now, and there had never been anywhere to go, but it was something she couldn’t help doing. Digging her fingers into him, she buried her face into his chest out of shame. She didn’t want him to see her so vulnerable, and yet to let it out came as a relief. To be open in her own way when for so long she’d kept her truth hidden as deep as she could. Chewing on one of the buttons of his dressing gown, she got her breathing together, and her crying settled down to a gentle sob. Her belly ached as if she had cramp and her throat was tight. In the same moment she felt free of a great burden and yet she knew it wasn’t gone. Nothing had been resolved, but all the same a little ground had been made. There was a slither of light shining in where once there had been no light at all. As he stroked her hair, she pulled herself up and nestled her chin on his collarbone so her tears dripped onto his pale, goose-pimpled skin before running down his back. He gave her a sniff while wrapping his right arm tight around her waist. She resembled an overgrown baby. A newborn desperately trying to figure out a way to return to the safety of the womb. The pain was sharp, and yet she wasn’t alone. Not this time. As he pushed his nose against her ear and breathed her in, she kept telling herself that indeed she wasn’t alone. Focusing on the warmth of his body and the tickle of his beard upon her face, in his arms she felt real, and at this moment, she felt tethered.
A Journal for Damned Lovers UK
A Journal for Damned Lovers US
Categories: Lucid
Author S. K. Nicholas 
Just got my second glass!
I feel like Llyod the Bartender, doing my best to keep you going 🙂
Ha ha! And now I feel like Jack Nicholson! Oh, no!
That’s not a bad thing. Well, unless you start trying to bludgeon your loved ones 😉
Or if you are a girl who looks like Jack Nicholson!
That would be weird, but if you were his ‘equivalent’, that would be interesting. Jack in The Shining has a certain something about him after all
I think, if I were his equivalent, we would be cleaning each other’s teeth after dinner with pickaxes. Love at first bite.
Haha. Brilliant 🙂
It has a certain something!
The dance to end all dances. Played out to that song used in the film- ‘Midnight, The Stars and You’.
I’ll have to go listen, I don’t remember it. Actually, maybe it’s time I saw this film again.
Make sure you watch the American cut of the film. It’s twenty minutes longer than the European version. Twenty more minutes of Jack x
Thank you, I’ll go look for it. Just heard the song, it’s beautiful.
Of course, if Jack and me as his match were dancing to it, it would be Midnight, Stars, You and Agricultural Tools.
I have that song on my phone. It’s nice to take a walk to.
And yes, you and Jack would give it your own unique twist 🙂
Have you seen Baz Luhrmann’s ‘The Great Gatsby’? Some of the music is Bryan Ferry reworked into jazz. Great album!
I haven’t you know. Not even read the book. Terrible isn’t it?
Bah, and I’ve never read Proust.
I think you’ll like it, though. As for the films made on it, Lurhmann’s is the best for me. The older ones were a little ‘clean’ (?). His is very vivid, full of colour.
I’ve never read Proust either 😉
We are terrible readers! Ha ha!
Gently gripping ☺️
Thank you 🙂
You’re welcome dearest.
🙂
There’s a lot of trust that’s needed, before someone can become that vulnerable, in front of someone else, and looks like this woman had, found it…
Yes, I think she’s stronger than she realises.
A profound encapsulation of the world…great write.
Thank you ever so much! I’m delighted that you enjoyed it 🙂
I think I will get a copy of your book. 🙂
That’s very kind of! If you do, I hope you enjoy it. It would mean a lot to me if it did x
I will let you know my thoughts. Maybe a review for you. 🙂
I couldn’t ask for more! Your support is very precious to me. Thank you 🙂 x
Just beautiful!
Thank you, my friend!
Needing is an amazing, yet a prisoning thing. You captured her emotions well
Thank you. I’m so glad you think I did x
I am not exaggerating when I say, I had to pause halfway to blink back tears while at my desk. This fit my current mood so well and really was beautiful and comforting. Really wonderful.
I’m ever so touched to hear that, I really am. For my words to reach you in such a way is all I could ever ask for ❤
Beautiful… left me with a feeling of peace ❤
Thank you! So glad it did ❤
This brought tears to my eyes. So well written
“In the same moment she felt free of a great burden and yet she knew it wasn’t gone.”
I’m touched that it did.
Thank you ever so much x