Halfway across the road and here come the headlights of another vehicle. So big and pretty and fast, they race towards me illuminating the trees either side of my startled, furry frame. My first thought is to keep going, but the closer the lights come, the more they draw me in, and although I know they’ll snuff me out for sure, I can’t help but let them grow like saucers in my eyes. In the glaring orbs that shine, I see birth and mystery and the sweet allure of death, and even though such a death will keep me from getting what I desire above all else, the music it makes takes me back to the numbing beauty of the womb. It’s a celestial lullaby that cradles my infant heart. Swaying there like a fool, the headlights swell in size and the growl of the engine that propels itself towards me rumbles and roars, and in my daze, I make it out to be the guttural howl of the universe; the voice of existence itself, ready to reclaim my atoms so it can make me into something new. And just for a second, more than anything I want it to take me. To scatter my ashes into the solar wind so I can be born again. Raising my paws, I await my fate, and yet above the roar of the engine I can make out the shrieks of the fox. Barking in a fever, he jumps into the road and sinks his teeth into the scruff of my neck. There’s a flash of pain, but all I can think about is how those lights look so pretty and how I wish he’d leave me to meet my maker. Yanking me away, he growls and shakes his head, dragging me out of harm’s way. With less than a second to spare, the lights swell, and the roar reaches a crescendo. There’s terror and the grave and then darkness followed by a view of the black sky and the pinpricks of light that could be the eyes of distant angels or perhaps the light of heaven creeping through the cracks in some biblical wall that separates man and animal from the glorious ones waiting for us in the great beyond. On my back, I thrash my tale as the fox lets go of me before licking the puncture wounds in my neck.

A Journal for Damned Lovers UK

A Journal for Damned Lovers US

Anthology UK / Anthology US