With my ear pressed against the door of my neighbours’ apartment, I could hear the girl sobbing from somewhere inside. There was a raised, muffled voice, presumably belonging to the guy, followed by the slamming of a door. The sobbing momentarily ceased before resuming, albeit somewhat softer.
“What are you doing?”
Jumping out of my skin, I spun around to find Meeko watching me with narrowed eyes.
“Shit me” I sputtered “why would you creep up on me like that?”
“I’m the one asking the questions” she scowled. She had her arms folded. Never a good sign. Folded arms meant suspicion. Coupled with narrowed eyes and I was in a sticky situation.
“I heard crying, I…”
“Here I am starving to death, and you’re spying on the pretty girl next door.”
“I wasn’t spying, I was curious.”
Shaking her head at me, she frowned as I hobbled towards her.
“Curious about the pretty girl next door.”
“Nonsense” I replied. “I heard crying and thought something might’ve been wrong.”
Continuing to shake her head, she didn’t budge from the doorway.
“Save me your sordid lies and give me my muffins.”
Handing her the slightly squashed packet, I followed her into our apartment, closing the door behind us as quietly as I could.
“They’re squashed!” she exclaimed.
“They were like that when I got them” I lied.
“Rubbish. You squashed them doing your best to spy on the girl next door.”
Ripping apart the plastic packaging, she sat down at the kitchen table and proceeded to stuff a whole muffin into her mouth as the breeze from the open window blew her hair this way and that. It wasn’t very ladylike. To see her eat that way reminded me of a hamster stuffing food into its cheeks, but it did make me smile.
“What are you smiling at?” she asked.
“You” I replied, and with that, I brought the box of toffee up to my nose and opened the lid. The toffee inside was warm, and when I sniffed it, I let out a groan as if I’d squeezed out a beer shit to end all beer shits. Swaying there like a drunk, I reached out a hand and ran my fingers through her hair as she swallowed the last of the muffin while peeling the wrapper off the second. There were many things running through my mind, and when I looked down at Meeko’s bare legs, the smell of the melting toffee caused a stirring in my loins.
“Whatever you’re thinking about, it will have to wait,” she said, “these muffins won’t eat themselves.”
Kneeling by her side, I waited until she took a bite out of the second muffin and then proceeded to kiss her. At first, she hesitated, but as we passed the blueberry goo back and forth between our mouths, she relaxed in her chair. Running my hand over the flesh of her smooth, pale legs, she tried speaking, but I wrapped my tongue around hers and sucked the words from out of her lungs.