Author S. K. Nicholas

x and i: a novel

a journal for damned lovers vol 1-3

Anxiety

  • 12,395 Days

      Snaking its way through your life, there’s a road that comes and goes. From time to time it calls out your name as you walk head down pretending you couldn’t care less. But underneath it all, you’re just seconds away from falling apart. You’re that same little girl curled up in bed wishing with… Read more

  • Inside a Dream

      You sleep in the clouds, and you can’t come down. You twist and turn and call out the name of the one you love, but the one you love is far from your arms. Is it yesterday, or is it tomorrow? Do you desire to feel the brilliance of a true kiss or is… Read more

  • Passover

      There’s a vortex with your name on it. There’s a hole in the ground that will take you to a place where the animals roam far from the scum we’re ashamed to call our own. When you squeeze your eyes shut and clench your teeth, do you feel their fur at the tips of… Read more

  • Sequences

      There’s beer and some music, but for the life of me, I can’t write a word even though it needs to happen above all else because if it doesn’t, my insides will turn black and rot away to dust. Almost fell asleep earlier. I closed my eyes and could feel myself drifting, but then I… Read more

  • The Number 24

      A bus journey to a bus stop then off and waiting for another in some English town or other. Cigarettes. No, no cigarettes. It’s bad for me, that’s what she says, and what she says goes. The number 24 arrives soon after. We get on and sit downstairs at my insistence because there might… Read more

  • Bible Black

      Your cigarette, your dress. Those curious eyes that seek me out in my dreams as the sky grows bible black. It whispers, and it condemns. It fingers and itches and seduces like the marble gods that knock on my window in the dead of night. In a gust of wind, the universe tickles your… Read more

  • XX

      There are flashing lights that flicker before my eyes. There are strange sensations spinning within me that only you could evoke, and yet your absence is felt more than anything. Swallowing mouthfuls of air as if my lungs were made for anything but breathing, I shake my head and see you dancing in the… Read more

  • The Deep

      There are outlines around their bodies. They shimmer and shine and reach out to me like the face of a lover from a photograph not yet taken. With my eyes darting this way and that, I embrace the decay that these hours bring and feel alive for not having given in. This transformation, it’s… Read more

  • Kids

      There’s a memory of me plunging my hand into a plastic jar full of Opal Fruits on my fifth birthday. I was in some kind of nursery school located on a road called Pastures Way. Whenever it was your birthday, you got to grab as many sweets in one go, and then you blew out… Read more

  • She-Bear

      The stars and the moon. The music of our lives and something to do with the slithers of light that come through her fingers as she takes herself to a place without darkness. It’s all white light and electricity and teeth and gums and curled toes and ceilings and swaying light bulbs. It’s all… Read more