Author S. K. Nicholas

x and i: a novel

a journal for damned lovers vol 1-3

Relationships

  • I Will

      Sketches of a nervous breakdown, and the taste of your mouth as you spit out a cigarette. I don’t want to write, I want to go to sleep instead. To forget about every little thing as your image flickers behind my eyes. To let madness take over and watch in awe as it drives… Read more

  • Get Back

      These cold, winter days where everything feels like the past. As the dying light says goodbye, I think about an ex-lover and the moments that existed between us. When I die, so shall they, and it will be as if they never even occurred. Such breathless intimacy, forgotten and discarded like it was unimportant.… Read more

  • Love & Footsteps

      Sometimes you try to become like others, but it’s just not you. They want profession. It’s all they’ve ever been told. To succeed, to chase the coin. But you’ve never felt that way; it’s never been of any interest. Maybe it’s self-obsession. Ego. Call it what you will. To me, life has always been… Read more

  • Lights / Passion

      Dead fish and half open eyes. A carousel slowly turning in the night sky. Streetlights vomit, as do you. Falling snow as spiders creep across the carpet to the sound of ritual fucking. Spread wide open while breathing in the scent of oranges, your fingers pluck away at the past. There’s this girl; she… Read more

  • La Mer

        I’m bed-ridden with the flu, although secretly I think it’s the Scarlette Plague, and my time on this planet is down to a matter of mere hours. I’ve come out in a rash too, although the attractive Asian girl at the chemist told me it was just an allergic reaction. I asked her… Read more

  • Bondage

      Human suffering. I want them to do to you what they did to me. I want to see the tears in your eyes as you realise this isn’t a dream. Drunk and frozen to my brittle bones, the shape of your breasts reminds me of the safety of my childhood. Eyelashes and nudity. Discarded promises.… Read more

  • Things That Aren’t There

      Generation dead = Netflix and chill. Deformed and malnourished. Mutilated like a police officer being dragged along frenzied Venezuelan streets. As the knife goes in, it’s reminiscent of how I used to take you; no mercy, no care, and now I’m trying hard to find a remedy in your faltering image. Stripped naked as the crowd… Read more

  • Isolation

      She snorts coke from the shaft of your cock. You’re worried it’ll go limp, so you think of taking her sister from behind, and everything stays the same. She cuts her wrists but gets bored yeah it’s so boring. Flashing lights and suicide. Daddy abuse and the sensation of drowning as you suck on… Read more

  • Beat

      Burning wheels along the highway. Drunken sandstorms and tears in the fabric of space-time. Roses growing in fields of corn. Chalk beneath my feet, and the skulls of dead lovers churning in my belly. Beat, always beating as women devour what remains of my flesh. So hot- always drenched in sweat as they reduce me… Read more

  • Human Stains

      I fantasise about having you, but you’ll never be mine. Maybe if I tried, but what’s the point in trying; these things come naturally or not at all. Lay next to me. Don’t say a word, just hold my hand and let us breathe in synch with the sound of a broken clock. The… Read more