The days’ are sickly hot, and the women wear as little as possible. Flesh is what they live for, and it’s what they sell. Their sex is power, and they use it to attract the dumb impulses of men. Men who can’t help being human. It’s pitiful, and humorous, in equal amounts. Everywhere you turn, stretchmarks and tits, lifeless and dead. Pouting lips, and grown men dribbling with hardened, tired cocks. They boil in cheap lust. Their dreams never going beyond swallowed body parts. I’m made of stardust, not hollow guts! There has to be more than this. Has to be. Otherwise, I’m just as bad as them. And that leaves me hopeless.
People swarm like insects. Love is vacant, like an empty parking lot. No dreams, only fragments of yesterday, strewn across the dusty ground. My eyes can’t help but watch it all, though. I’d shut them tight if I could, but that would be careless. Sometimes, you find something worth looking at. A tender moment. A delicate smile upon the face of a tender soul. Someone will occasionally stand out. Someone with an honest heart. Who behaves the way they do because they feel compassion and warmth. But these souls don’t come around very often. And even when they do, they’re often crushed before they have time to blossom.
Integrity is meaningless around these parts. Beauty nothing more than flesh and image. The mysteries of perception, ignored and left to wither like a neglected plant. When someone smiles a genuine smile, it leaves me motionless. When you see it in their eyes, that honesty, it makes all the ugliness blur out of view. When they speak words of truth, it silences all those mouths with nothing to say. The babble that grinds away. The masses of dim, empty heads. When someone with vision comes into your life, things click into place. You see what’s important, and what needs leaving behind. And all that trash that you carry around with! All that useless junk, holding you back and dragging you down! When you finally let it go, it will never, ever be missed.
So much waste in our lives. So many messy attempts and regretful failures. So much cheapness. So many lost souls, just wandering around imitating others. The world turns with far too many people looking in one direction. There’s not enough difference. Individuality reduced to fashion, or what funky little job we kill our time with. It should be about beliefs! About visions! The freedom of thoughts, and the heart’s true desires! It’s a word I use far too often, but only because I’m reminded of it everywhere I look. Banality. It sucks the life out of me. I’m searching for believers, for souls that dare to open themselves up to more than what we are told to accept as enough. Magic. The magic of love and creation. Inject me with freedom. Give me something that won’t ever leave me.
Taking a shower, I feel refreshed as the slime and grease of others washes from my body. The day is cooler now. Words replacing dim and dreary faces. A certain calm befalls me. With classical music playing, I lean back and look at the sky and trees outside. The grace of nature. It’s beauty silent and deafening. No need to get wrapped up in melodrama and pointless activities. Don’t waste time, just breathe it in. Open your arms to peace. No one should feel the need to sacrifice themselves to feel accepted. Just find yourself a quiet area away from the rest, and revel in the beauty of yourself. No flaws. No ugliness. Only beauty.