I’m trudging through these fields behind my old house. A few dog walkers pass me by but other than their fleeting appearance, I’m pretty much left to my own devices. Felt a calling, you see. The animals and trees were speaking to me. They spoke my name in hushed tones that carried in the breeze, and I came as surely as that. Into the surrounding woods I venture, and so the sky blue above makes way for a blanket of branches and leaves that keep me safe in their presence. Getting down on my knees in a small clearing shielded from the outside world, I loosen my belt and slide down my trousers. Looking around, the animals watch me from the shadows but ever so discreetly, dare I spot them and lose concentration. Clenching both balls in my right hand, I picture her legs, and between them, the place I dream about when life becomes too much. The wind rustles my hair. It kicks shit up from the ground that circles me like a swarm of bees. Maybe. Kinda. Yeah, whatever. Stroking myself off, I clench my teeth and say her name. No, I spit her name, and when the visions in my head collide with the energy in my loins, her image causes me to tremble and salivate. With one hand wrapped around my cock, the other spreads its fingers and plunges into the damp earth. Nature consumes me because in nature I find God, and in God, she dances like no one else can. That’s why I’m here, giving what I have to give not caring if I lose my mind in the process. I say that, but I lost my mind years ago, and it was, without doubt, the best thing that ever happened to me. There are tiny explosions in my head. They cluster around my temples, and as her image dances behind my eyes, they ripple through my body causing my throat to tighten until I can barely breathe. Seconds away from coming, she lies on her back for me, and when she spreads herself, I see in her the eyes of all the animals, twinkling and glistening like lights on the horizon in the dead of night. They suck me into a place only she can deliver, and as my body’s on the brink of the little death, the eyes take what’s left of my mind and together we fly straight into that wild heart of hers.

A Journal for Damned Lovers on Amazon.co.uk

A Journal for Damned Lovers on Amazon.com