Author S. K. Nicholas

x and i: a novel

a journal for damned lovers vol 1-3

Anxiety

  • Swallowed

    I collected a vision of her, of her walking towards a point overlooking the town. A place where the sun smashes down, and she goes there, planting her hips, ready to flower, and I follow her, because she’s a beginning. Everything that moves goes away from here, but that’s already happened. Upon waking, I light… Read more

  • Please

    Eyes in the fire. Virgin Mary. Breasts so tender. Fingers so itchy. Waking in the early hours to dreams of my hands being cut off. Bolting upright and sweating like a fucker. Harder and harder against the window. Rainfall so deafening. Your body should be mine. It should keep me warm on these lonely nights.… Read more

  • Lonely Roads

      A soundtrack of passionate sighs as we sit in silence watching the waves draw ever close. Hysterical, I open a bottle of beer using my teeth and light a cigarette. Things drown, and as your hands linger on the steering wheel, there’s only yesterday that keeps us together. Wrapped in blankets, you’re just like… Read more

  • Years and Years and Years

    It’s closing time, and all the roads are empty and covered with snow. Red leaves swim in blood, and as you slip and fall, my fingers are too busy rolling a cigarette to catch you. It’s Sunday, but the days are unimportant. Lazy hours spent in bed with nowhere to go but each other’s arms,… Read more

  • Two-Second-Panic-Attack

    Seductive cunt. She’s got a name, but I can’t remember it. It’s not important. Shouting lovers uninteresting. Stream of misplaced thoughts, gone. Layers of porno and saliva that drip from my mouth to hers. Legs raised upon my shoulders, I’ll give it to her hard. Squeezed tits. Cursing always. She bites as I pull her… Read more

  • The Way You Hush

    It’s all for you, one way or the other. These words that bubble inside drenched in your scent and so heavy to touch. Underneath your clothes, they pick like fingers at the new horizon. Neon witches drifting in and out of shadow, the time is never right, yet there’s no excuse for calling it quits.… Read more

  • Exorcyst Girl

      Dead wombs and anti-matter. Brushing teeth to remove nicotine stains as my fingernails itch through nervous exhaustion- the pain in my gut is there for all to see. Exorcyst girl with bloodied hands gripping the steering wheel. Crashing cars and prophecies of the Bible, they burn in my loins with an equal measure of… Read more

  • Shifting

      As you roll with one eye on the uncrossing of her legs, my zygomatic arch throbs as if touched for the very first time. Leaves of rain lodged in the back of your throat, you light a cigarette as the hand of god traces your love upon the flesh of her belly. Lonely nights… Read more

  • Same Old Malaise

      It’s in the way you get laid complaining that others don’t treat you like a woman. That they use you as an object, like a machine, ready and willing at the drop of a hat to fulfil their every need. Just a phone call away, and you’re theirs to do with as they please.… Read more

  • She’s In And Within

      Sleeping against the world, I open my eyes and feel her close by. Sat on the bedroom floor putting on her make-up, she’s smiling while bathed in morning sunlight. It’s the kind that looks so joyful yet forces you to curl up beneath the sheets for warmth. Looking up at me as I watch, I… Read more