Author S. K. Nicholas

x and i: a novel

a journal for damned lovers vol 1-3

Depression

  • Don’t Wanna Wake Up Next To Your Stretched Skin

    waking up next to your stretched skin my eyes hurt from the dirty sunlight that pours in through the window head cracked like an egg mouth dry with shame, suffocating so heavy, so dead this is what i wanted this is what i get cheapness, drowning in empty acts that attack the very heart of… Read more

  • Writing Saved My Lost Soul

    It seems that going mad was the best thing that ever happened to me. Before the breakdown of my relationship, and the mess that followed, I’d become complacent. Writing didn’t mean that much to me. Yes, I was working on a novel, but that had been reduced to wallpaper long beforehand. Whenever I tried to… Read more

  • This Sullen Welsh Heart

      My soul is strange. It’s tender and tired, like an old Welsh song. Yet it’s also so hateful, like a spurned lover left dangling in the wind. Like a discarded rag, caught on a branch of some broken tree. The scent of her room, still so fresh after all this time. Dust and memory.… Read more

  • Heat

    Have a beer, a smoke too. Take a piss, and feel like a king. Remember the way she used to give herself to you. No shame, only physicality. Hips of a goddess, and breasts that mirrored the shape of my hands just right. Waking up next to her in the morning, I’d always slip one… Read more

  • Nights

    the lights outside flicker lonely souls circling sidewalks eyes down to the dirty, wasteful ground petrified. desolute. alone. a labyrinth surrounding suffocating, eternally the sky does not exist for them too high! too high! Read more

  • You’re Doing It Just Right

      Don’t be upset. There’s no need to feel lonely. Lay down upon your bed, and breathe in the warm air that longs to comfort you. Listen to the birds, to the traffic as it endlessly rolls past outside. Let the tears come, let all the pain in the world empty itself from your tired… Read more

  • The Only Way Out Is Through

      don’t let the days bring you down don’t let the hate in your heart drag you beneath the surface where the waves ride high above your head, when there’s so much sadness pumping through your veins with things going wrong at every opportunity it makes it all seem so impossible, words that never come… Read more

  • Sometimes

    all the dreadful people the ones who try too much to be real something they’re not weighing me down like heavy balloons i’m a good guy really with a decent heart but the world’s turned me into a cynical prick with hardened feelings and a lack of sympathy for anyone but myself i try to… Read more

  • Someone

    When I feel low kinda worthless y’know? someone comes out of nowhere and makes me feel alive once more you should never need another to make you happy but it really fucking helps Read more

  • Misery Me

    the sounds of drilling and dogs barking no other people just me and my self loathing basking in sickly sunshine cigarettes and headaches emptiness forever even the trees don’t care for what  i have to say they just sway like they’ve done for centuries everything goes on pain, love and misery oh misery me stood… Read more