Author S. K. Nicholas

Lovers come and go, bringing moments of joy never to be forgotten. They bring pain, too, plenty of it in fact, and that won’t be forgotten either. It makes us who we are, and gives the journey of life its meaning. Gives it a little texture, if you will. I’ve had several lovers, and I’ve been in love, yet I’m still waiting for that ‘someone’. She won’t be perfect. She won’t float down from the sky accompanied by some heavenly orchestra, nor will she take away all my fears and make me flawless. But I know there’s someone out there, someone who’ll make me never want to love another. And that for me, is where it’s at. Finding someone who you’ll want to stick with through the shit, and never for a second dream of letting them go. There have been times when I’ve gazed into a lover’s eyes and felt happy inside. Moments when I’ve been with someone and felt blissfully content. I can’t deny the happiness others have given me, yet it’s never been quite right. Maybe at the time, I wasn’t fully aware of it, but at the back of my mind, I can see I’ve always held back. Held back loving that person as much as I should’ve because deep down, I knew I couldn’t give them my heart. And I’ve pondered the possible reasons a million times. Gone over so much ground trying to find the answers. There’s no magic formula. It’s just about stumbling across that one person who cuts through all that has no meaning. That one heart that grips you like no other. It won’t be perfection, but when it’s right, you’ll feel it in your bones, and it’ll be beyond all other sensations you’ve ever experienced. You can’t rely on someone else to cure your inner demons. That’s just not how it works. But I firmly believe, that love has the ability to set you free. If you’re willing to help yourself, then the rest will follow. You shouldn’t make the mistake of thinking it’s up to the other person to sort your problems out, and nor should you believe that love will make them simply disappear. But it can give you the belief, and the desire, to make a change. It can give you that sense of purpose that you were so desperately lacking. That vision of salvation you never thought possible. One day that someone will come along you’ve spent your whole life looking for, and what follows will be a perfect storm that obliterates everything else.