October sun on your face and rust-coloured paint on your fingernails as the city swallows itself along with all those that were once so happy to call it their home. A kiss on the cheek and one or two pinky fingers on the back of your skull as you eat your sandwich thinking about what it will be like to die, not that you divulge this to me, of course. Picking out a slice of cheese and bringing it to my lips, you frown and act so offended, but there are far worse injustices to suffer, and when I kiss you on the forehead, the theft of your food is quickly forgotten. It’s far too cold though, and such displeasure puts a stop to the chance of anything happening between us, much to my childish annoyance. Outside the window, the city is sinking in on itself over and over again, and while I stand there observing its doom, I’m laughing but sad at the thought of those I used to know meeting their end far too soon. Fetching another blanket from the airing cupboard, I wrap it around you and ask if you want me to fill up your hot water bottle, to which you sullenly reply yes. You look so sad, and to emphasise your melancholy, you stick out your bottom lip and wait for the taste of my mouth. This is a Thursday, right, or could it be Saturday? The longer we remain together, the trickier it is to keep track of time, for the less need we have of the outside world. It was never of much use to us to begin with, but now we have each other, its meaning has faded even further. Leaving the room and shutting the door behind me, I hear you singing to yourself while I’m blowing out mouthfuls of cold air walking down the stairs to the kitchen. Popping on the kettle, I empty the hot water bottle in the sink and look up at the clock that’s on the wall above the fridge. Lost in thought, I lose myself in the seconds that tick away, and even when the kettle’s boiled and you’re calling to me from upstairs, all I can do is stand there in a daze as one world ends and another begins.

A Journal for Damned Lovers on Amazon.co.uk

A Journal for Damned Lovers on Amazon.com